Why is it, that lately I am constantly annoyed by someone or something, even if it is just small things? I really start to question myself – is it really the others or is it just me? Am I such an unsatisfied person who constantly has to pick fights and starts perpetual nagging about everything? Usually it is gossiping colleagues, former friends annoying the hell out of me, and even people I do not even know (and who do not know me for a matter of fact, what still does not stop them from making inappropriate remarks) which bring me “up on the palm” (German saying, does not make sense in English at all but it is still funny to just translate those saying and throw them into a conversation/text for the fun of it).
A girl I know recently wrote a blog entry how she changed over the last two years. She found (I think) a poem from back then and wrote some stuff about how you should always be yourself and go your way in order to be happy and all. She also wrote about that she tried to change to become a better person. Blablabla – the usual stuff which everyone knows. Not that it is not true and that I disagree. But can you really change who you are? SHOULD you change who you are? Besides the fact that it proves to be really hard to change your character (in any kind of direction) on purpose, is not your character the thing that makes you to the person who you are – with all your flaws and of course also your good sides? It goes without saying that you should always be honest to yourself and behave in a way that you can live with. But changing who you are to please others? I know that I would feel fake and as if I am acting. And I am pretty sure others would notice as well.
Change comes with time and not on purpose. You will change in one way or another. You will get altered by good and bad experiences. But definitely not by will.
Love, S.












